The bacon cannon

Imagine a war torn environment. Weary soldiers on both sides of the line eye each other knowing the coming battle will be brutal. A group of soldiers pushes a large device to the front of the line. It looks like a standard artillery emplacement with a grille on the back end. One soldier pushes the button labeled “sizzler.”

The rest of the troops prep their rifles for combat. “Fire in the hole!” a soldier screams, pushing the big red button button. A shell composed of hot, perfectly-cooked bacon rockets from the tube toward the opposing forces. The smell of bacon hits the enemy just before the slices begin to land. The enemy line immediately begins to dissolve as they scramble to eat the savory weapon launched their way. Seconds later, our soldiers open up with their rifles on the bacon buffet line. Battle over in less than a minute.

And that folks, is weaponized bacon. U.S. Army, you are welcome.



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